Ball tampering crisis: Steve Smith jokes and Delete Facebook jokes

Topical jokes including Steve Smith jokes as Australia melts down over someone scratching a ball. Jokes on Facebook, passports and more.

cricket ball

Brexiters will get even angrier when the EU slaps import duties on British passports.

Journalism today is writing Facebook scare stories and then putting them on, er, Facebook.

Cambridge Analytica unfairly influencing elections. squeal media. Well they’d be the experts on that.

If you are going to talk about sinister groups influencing elections then please start with the Daily fucking Mail.

Cambridge Analytica, there, making Sam Allardicci look positively self effacing.

So Cambridge Analytica good at entrapment, less good at noticing when they’re being entrapped.

No wonder Putin is poisoning folk in Wiltshire – he can bankrupt the Tory Party with a few WhatsApps.

I suppose if you’re insane enough to pay £200k to play tennis with Mr Blobby then you’re insane enough to mass poison Salisbury to settle a score.

Ant McPartlin is gonna be photoshopped on to the Kremlin soon.

New Bradley Wiggins claims as suspicion pattern of Benelyn use emerges before A Question of Sport appearances.

Ball bawl

Have Australia not blamed Pakistan yet?

Steve Smith is going to claim he has asthma soon.

Steve Smith is the Cambridge Analytica of cricket.

England also tried ball tampering but umpires tend to notice when you try bowling with a tennis ball.

You can probably put the remainder of Steve Smith’s reputation in some sort of small urn.

I wondered why Steve Smith took a chainsaw to matches.

Jeremy Corbyn tonight sacks his Minister for the Tory Party.

From tonight’s tweets you’d think Jeremy Corbyn fired Martin Luther King out of a cannon, as opposed to some buffoon who fell out of a snooker club.

Owen Smith: the man who constantly calls for revotes because he constantly loses elections.

Wait till Brexiters see our new foreign passports have ‘I’m a smelly bum Brit’ scrawled in the bottom left corner.

Comic Relief say they will no longer rely on outdated stereotypes as they unveil new skit with David Walliams pretending to be a camp vicar.

Brexiters will get even angrier when the EU slaps import duties on British passports.

Journalism today is writing Facebook scare stories and then putting them on, er, Facebook.

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