Andy Murray wins: Wimbledon jokes

All the best jokes as Andy Murray wins Wimbledon, making middle class people get briefly excited.

andy murrayAndy Murray adds to that list of world dominating Scots such as Mel Gibson and Det Insp Jim Taggart.

Scots disgusted after learning this doesn’t qualify us for the World Cup.

An independent Scotland would be funded by Andy Murray’s tennis winnings.

Message from Alex Salmond: “If Scotland votes Yes, you’re back to no champion.” hahahahaha

West London will go wild if Murray wins. By go wild, I mean ‘eat an extra strawberry (organic)’.

Now that we’ve got a champion, Wimbledon might only sell nine tickets next year.

After the joy of winning Wimbledon for the first time in 77 years, we’ll have the anger of having only won Wimbledon once in 77 years.

I’m surprised the BBC website isn’t just a picture of Andy Murray’s mouth wide open.

Cameron and Miliband cheered in unison. And I thought Dave hated the unions.

How tennis works: Man makes historic once-in-a-lifetime achievement. Man’s girlfriend trends on Twitter.

Speaking of 77-year waits, has Abu Qatada gone?

Right we’ve had 77 years of tennis whining. I want to see proper celebrating. I want AK47s being fired and naked strawberry throwing.

Wayne Rooney’s making a racket in the royal box. Security have told him that you can buy them in shops.

Alex Salmond and David Cameron are there. They’re both very strong on the backhander side.

Abu Qatada is gone. Now can we get rid of Greg Rusesdski?

If Andy Murray wins Wimbledon, Britain will immediately start hating him and support the dude ranked 308.

Andy Murray goes through all that pain and punishment so that he can be a hero….to Daily Mail readers.

All jokes written by and copyright of Newsfox.

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